Losing my virtue-inity

What ever happened to ‘virtuous Pia’? Where did she go? 

I suspect she’s buried under the mountain of wine bottles out on the curb waiting for recycling day.

Turns out that all the best intentions in life can’t save you from… well… life. 

A few years ago, I embarked on a life changing journey to challenge myself. I quit everything. Cheese. Sugar. Carbs. Gluten. Jeebus help us, even wine.

(Reader: No! Not wine!

Me: Don’t worry, it didn’t last)

Damn it was affective. I lost about 10kg. My skin looked AMAZING. I finished an Xterra race (barely). I felt fucking incredible. Hell, I’m pretty sure I got taller.

Three years later and I find myself almost back where I started – Friday night, with a giant glass of wine in my hand, unapologetically eating my way through a pack of Girl Guide biscuits and watching endless episodes of Grace and Frankie (shoosh you. try it).

So what the hell happened?!

Let me tell you what happened…


Despite all your best efforts  (I’m including predictive text in here – yes, I AM trying to type ‘duck’ – fail), life gets in the way.

To save you some time, here’s a couple of highlights from the passed couple of years getting in the way of my virtue.

1. Mother nature – earthquakes suck. Big, small, medium, who actually cares. Earthquakes lead to stress. Stress leads to cheese and cheese is a gateway drug to cheesecake. Everyone knows that. 

2. Personal development – hahaha. Psych! Isn’t that just another fucking word for ‘life’?! Ain’t no one got time for that.

3. Life – let’s fill this with some of the following. Family, bills, DIY, Netflix, yoga pants (cookie pants), friends – not limited to, but including current, new and ex, goals, expectations, washing, weather and Griffins L&P biscuits.

4. Injuries – what the actual fuck. Everything is trucking along, perfectly fine, and the next thing you know you’re hooked up to a morphine drip with busted discs in your spin. Uuuugh. Screw you.

So look. I thought it would be easy. I thought I was pretty rad because I have up halloumi and got addicted to chia seeds. I could watch tv through the gap in my thighs. I genuinely believed I liked mock-late (I dont. It’s gross).

I wish my life was permanently changed and I survived on a diet of fitness videos (suck a bag of dicks fitness apps). But the truth is this, I’m human. I’m fallible. Im OK as I  am. Most of all, I really like chocolate biscuits.

A healthy, happy Valentines Day

This post is dedicated to things I love.

Happy Valentines Day!

Happy Valentines Day!

Sometimes, in a moment of desperation or despair, it can be easy to obsess about all of the unhealthy things I once had a passionate love affair with.

Things like fondue, garlic bread, Milky Ways, McDonalds cheeseburgers with added mayonnaise, strawberry daiquiris, crunchy nut cornflakes, Doritos, raspberry ice tea, cookie dough, chocolate chip bacon waffles and teriyaki chicken donburi.

That last one brought a tear to my eye.

But this post is not about the things I miss, it’s about the things I love. So here goes:

  1. The new me. Boom.
  2. 85% cocoa dark chocolate.
  3. Fluro. Any fluro but fluro gym gear DOES make you workout harder/run faster.
  4. Coconut water.
  5. Beetroot in smoothies.
  6. Yoga on Saturday mornings with my amazing friends Karen and Jen.
  7. Buckwheat pancakes.
  8. My Food Bag.
  9. Supportive workmates.
  10. IMG_20140208_085159Homemade muesli.
  11. Gluten/dairy free options that don’t make you hate life.
  12. Soy custard.
  13. Hill walks with Jeff and Chuck the pug… and her shoes.
  14. Insanely motivating personal trainers – here’s looking at you Elly.
  15. My mum who sent my blog to her ukulele group.
  16. Snack sized cucumbers.
  17. Red wine.
  18. Kale. Honest.
  19. Lululemon.
  20. Wellington “Summer”.
  21. Anyone who reads this blog.

Love yourself. Send yourself a card even. Like your own photos on Facebook. Honestly, that is all you need.

Wishing you all a very healthy, happy Valentines Day. May your days be full of carob powder, calf stretches and beetroot smoothies. Enjoy the ride.